Seth Barnes Apr 10, 2010 8:00 PM

Handing someone you love over to suffering

Henri Nouwen is profound on the subject of how we contribute to suffering: People who live close together can be sources of great sorrow for one an...

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Henri Nouwen is profound on the subject of how we contribute to suffering:

People who live close together can be sources of great sorrow for one another. When Jesus chose his twelve apostles, Judas was one of them. Judas is called a traitor. A traitor, according to the literal meaning of the Greek word for "betraying," is someone who hands the other over to suffering.

The truth is that we all have something of the traitor in us because each of us hands our fellow human beings over to suffering somehow, somewhere, mostly without intending or even knowing it.

Many children, even grown-up children, can experience deep anger toward their parents for having protected them too much or too little. When we are willing to confess that we often hand those we love over to suffering, even against our best intentions, we will be more ready to forgive those who, mostly against their will, are the causes of our pain.

Have you experienced this? Sharing where you've wounded others or been wounded despite the best of intentions can help readers with their own area of struggle.

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