I have two routes I can safely run along our rural roads. One of them leads half a mile up a steep grade. By the time you reach the top, you've got to be in good shape to not be gasping for breath. Usually as I run, my mind spins in many different directions. Sometimes I pray. Just as fiber is necessary to clean your system out, so, it is important to leave your brain on idle periodically. It self-cleanses. The dross of broken relationships, unfinished business, and God-thoughts comes floating to the top.

Some of the best thoughts I have come while running. The other day as I was nearing the top of the hill-from-hell, a God-thought came to my mind. "Will you give it all up?" He asked me. He doesn't have to say much. And if He's going to ask for all the marbles, it makes sense that He'd do it when I'm at the point of giving up anyway.

"Give up my home, my retirement?"

God seemed to be nodding his head.

"Give up my ministry? Not that it's mine, mind you, you and the board already have that."

Again the divine affirmative.

"Give up Karen and the kids?"

I think He was silent, waiting.

God knows that I, like any human being, have a tendency toward presumption, toward squatter's rights. I've had the keys to my house so long, I forget that the bank holds the deed. God's not sadistic, He just wants all my affections. He knows my knees will buckle if I try to do this thing on my own strength.

"Yeah, God," I prayed, "you know it's all yours anyway. I sure would miss Karen or the kids, but if you want them, they're yours."

I thought I felt the Lord smile.

A gut-check like that keeps you honest. Too many of us are control-freaks, afraid to trust God.